At work I heard it. At the bank I heard it. Even just walking through the supermarket I heard it.
“Happy Mother’s Day”
Sweet and innocuous comment right? Just a stranger trying to be nice to another stranger in a world with ever lessening niceness. Well sorry my loves but I am here to tell you it is not nice to randomly walk up to someone and say Happy Mother’s Day unless you actually in fact know she’s a mother. And don’t just assume that because she is toting a little darling along that she is a mother. She could be a babysitter, a nanny, an auntie, etc.
I know some people will say I’m being ridiculous, after all it’s just a stranger trying to wish you well. Except, when I hear these words, I hurt. I hurt because I probably will never have children in the conventional way or maybe at all. I hurt for a few of my friends that have gone through infertility issues and have not been able to conceive. I hurt for the friends that have had still born babies or miscarriages. I hurt for other people, like me, who didn’t have the greatest relationship with their mother.
To all of you out there who are moms I praise and bless and pray for you. You have literally brought life into the world and (hopefully) you are molding and shaping a human being into a decent person. I acknowledge Dads are important too as I learned a lot from my father. But there is something about the bond between a mother and child that is sacred and sacrosanct. Even if you have a terrible relationship it is something that is biologically ingrained into us to seek after and something we want.
So please, I beg of you, unless you are 100% positive that the person standing near you in indeed a Mama Bear, please don’t just arbitrarily assume that they are a mother just because they are a girl.