Mustard Seed

Oh mustard seed

So tiny and so small

Help me hold on

Because I feel as if I’ll fall

Away from hope

Away from love

Away from any belief

In God up above

The road I’m on is treacherous

The valley dark and wide

I feel I’ve lost all hope

I feel so empty deep inside

So mustard seed please help me

To hold on to the light

Help me get out of this hole

And find the strength to fight.

With A Click Of A Button

Today I had a strange…experience…moment…sense of awareness
I really don’t know how to describe it. I received a referral for a pair of siblings whose mother had just died. Unfortunately I’ve seen this quite a few times as a Care Manager but for some reason this instance really caught me a little off guard.

Prior to my involvement, the mother had been part of the child’s treatment team and thus was listed under the contacts portion of the file. We are only supposed to keep active participants in the child’s file so if someone else takes over, they know who to contact. So since this mother was not going to be part of the children’s treatment because she had passed away, I had to delete her.

It was 2 clicks and she was gone. And for some reason this really hit something deep inside of me about how easy it is to be gone, really gone, with only a few clicks on the computer.

Click…your social security card and identity are gone.
Click..no birth certificate
Click…a death certificate.
Click…payment received for burial
Click…goes the coffin lid
And then you are gone for good.

When I deleted this person’s name, this person I had never met and would never get to meet, I hurt on a deeply human, soul based level, and I almost cried. I really don’t know why. I wasn’t sad today. Nothing bad happened to me personally. But still this moment struck a cord.

The world is messed up on a deep level at this point. Don’t let the ones you love and the ones who desperately need love walk away because you are too busy clicking you life away while they are one click away from gone.